American Outlaws Des Moines

After re-connecting with a friend I made during the last World Cup, she asked me if I’d take a commission for the Des Moines chapter of American Outlaws. “Uh, okay,” I thought. I wasn’t real sure what I would do, until I remembered the Iowa state flag is one of those ones with words on it.

Hey, there’s an idea. A good idea.

I got to work.


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The finished product. I changed the slogan, slapped a bandana on the eagle, made the logo bigger, and added some sparkly outlines to the text. Other than that, it’s the Iowa flag. I had a devil of a time finding the right color and weight in red and blue fabric for the side panels, so I gave up and just painted them. This was kind of messy and time-consuming, but ensured the red and blue used everywhere on the banner would match. Relatively speaking, it also wasn’t that much more time consuming than trying to scour fabric stores for something suitable.

Detail of the center panel. You can see the spots under the eagle’s right wing where I spilled paint and tried to clean it up. Hey, this is handmade here.


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Close-up of the eagle’s head. I had to try to figure out how to indicate the folds in the cloth on an image that’s otherwise flat and un-shaded. The eagle’s head is also done in pearl white.


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Close-up of the ribbon. Even though it’s not done so in the original, I outlined the lettering on the banner, because, well, you always gotta outline this stuff. Adding sparkly paint is optional.

I’m pretty happy with how this turned out. Notice I said this was a commission? Yeah, it’s official: Ask me if you’d like a banner done for your team/supporters’ group/cat/bar mitzvah/senior center/etc. That trip to South Africa next year ain’t gonna pay for itself, so let’s talk.

Posted in finished projects, nats, somebody paid for this |

Hi, we’re the replacements

The banners that went missing after the 7/11 match never did turn up, so I had to re-do them. While I had the supplies out, I went ahead and added two new ones to the list.


Pat Phelan, “GRIT”: That’s an awful lot of blue paint for a guy with red hair.


Emmanuel Osei, “SLY”: After hearing that he doesn’t entirely speak English, I worried that his word–chosen in honor of his habit of showing up for sneak attack clearances–might get lost in translation.

Now, the re-paints:
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Posted in finished projects, revs, words |

I went to Norway and all you got was this lousy post

Two weeks after I got back, here’s the grim and frostbitten report from the dumbest soccer-related vacation I’ve taken to date. You can follow along in the gallery as you read.

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Posted in finished projects, goofy, how did I get here, I can't believe we pulled this off, revs, why we do this, you should've been there |

MISSING

Seriouspost:

Have you seen us? We’re Albright, Alston, Barnes, Igwe, and Tierney. We’re most of the Revs’ back line, and we’re missing.

I’m not being facetious here–these five banners were last seen after the Revs game on 7/11 and are unaccounted for since then. If you’ve got any info on their whereabouts, please contact tifosi@hooverdam.net ASAP.

Thanks!

Posted in revs, works in progress |

unexpected cameo

I’ll get around to finishing the Norway adventure story at some point, but first, look who turned up in the Fort this past weekend:

hey ang
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Angela Hucles and the banner I modeled after her. (Since I got asked this at the game, yes, I know the skin tone of Columbia in the banner looks a lot whiter than the real person. A. Hucles has been playing outside all summer, you know. B. It wasn’t just skin tone I changed from the original poster but also facial structure).

Posted in breakers, goofy, nats, why we do this, ww i posters, you should've been there |

Ålesund’s starting to happen

ULTRA PEANUT’S LIST OF NOTABLE THINGS THAT HAPPENED THE LAST FEW DAYS

  • Got on a plane for Frankfurt, then one for Oslo, then one for Ålesund, which is small enough they have stair trucks (“you’re gonna get hop-ons”)
  • Saw a little kid in the Oslo airport in a 2006 USMNT jersey
  • Accidentally walked into the men’s room in the Oslo airport
  • Hey, look, transatlantic travel will do that to you, okay?
  • Had a cookout on the side of a mountain with the Revs’ old GK and some of his pals
  • Walked around town buying candy
  • Ate pizza that was, for some reason, served St. Louis style
  • Bought a bunch of souvenirs
  • Repeatedly tried to explain why, exactly, two dumb Americans would travel to an obscure part of Norway
  • I understand the sun sets here at some point, but I haven’t really seen it
  • Ate huckleberries right off the bushes
  • Ran barefoot across another team’s field (I’m up to 4 now)
  • Hiked around the perimeter of a mountain, coming out of the woods into the parking lot of a 3rd division club, where a bunch of kids were playing a pickup game of cricket
  • Got taken back into town by a suspicious looking orange party van
  • Did I mention the van was driven by one of the extras from Metalocalypse?
  • Learned that Denmark is apparently the Canada of Norway

my toes
Team color pedicures are crucial

More at some point, along with full photo set. We’re still two days out from an actual gameday.

Posted in goofy, how did I get here, I can't believe we pulled this off, revs, works in progress, you should've been there |

melonhead of the century

Remember this thing from last September?

Those two banners finally debuted this evening.

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Posted in finished projects, goofy, I can't believe we pulled this off, melonhead, revs, why we do this, you should've been there |

Campaign 2010

If internet memes can help elect a president, could they help convince the US men’s national team to take along certain players who’re on the borderline to make the cut for South Africa?

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Posted in nats, works in progress |

and now, possibly the best worst joke I’ll come up with all season

I’d like to see the Sounders do a Freddie Ljungberg bobblehead night. You press it, and it has to take an Imitrex and go lie down in a dark, quiet room for six hours.

Posted in goofy |

mario league soccer

Q. What happens when the guy who sells you your season tickets calls you up and asks you how to make a banner?

A.

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Kyle Lindsay, my box office homeboy, asked me for help in putting together a banner. Said he had the idea to do one of Wario in Revs getup after seeing someone in Germany a while back with a similar one. I thought the concept was fantastic, and offered to get the template sewn up and traced, then to teach him how to paint it. Julie volunteered her attic and some painting services to the cause, too. I love this banner; it’s a neat, neat idea that I haven’t really seen elsewhere in MLS, very eye-catching. My only regret is we realized too late that the patch on his shoulder should say “Mario League Soccer” and have the foot kicking a turtle, not a ball.

Wario is wearing uniform #6, a decision we made because we don’t have any real leg-breakers on the squad anymore, but we do have a guy with a bad temper who won’t shut up. (In the extremely remote chance he’s reading this, we love you for it, Jay).

Posted in finished projects, revs |